Pimp Moms Ride
S.W. ‘s ARE DEAD! No not Stuart Weisman’s, Station Wagons! Volvo announced yesterday it will cease and desist of making their iconic Wagons (sales averaging only 2 per dealership/year), Audi and Mercedes are not far behind. Trendy moms (and not so trendy moms) drove station wagons from 1950-1980, slowly tapering off over the past 25 years. No other item has had that long of a shelf life with women other than a DVF wrap dress!
The love of station wagons has plunged like the ratings for Desperate Houewives.
Why?
1980’s BIG SHOULDER PADS AND BIG DOORS – THE MINIVAN is introduced
1990’s THE MILITARY LOOK – IN THE FORM OF A HUMMER (get your mind out of the gutter) AND SUV take off like the first Kate Spade handbag
2000’s CROSSDRESSER – LIKE MIRANDA HOBBS WEARING MEN’S TIES – THE CROSSOVER is embraced
Personally, this little writer, has avoided the Minivan and Crossover like Birkenstocks and a backpack! The Skinny Scoop concluded that 34% of women drive a Minivan. Stacey’s mom who’s “got it going on” doesn’t drive one but apparently a large percentage of you out there do!
A minivan is “convenient & practical” those of you say (so is the sponge I wash dishes with) ok but why, because of the captain chairs & sliding doors? Sounds like I’m describing Star Trek.
Please someone tell me what it is, because being in fashion all these years, never even needing a car in Manhattan, I see a car as an extension of your outfit, a very large, very expensive accessory like a Chanel bag.
Image #1 I’m dressed up to go to dinner out with my husband and I pull up to the valet in a minivan? NO
Image #2 My husband driving one, oops there goes the thought of someone getting lucky tonight! NO
Image #3 My kids are running out to the car from school and ours looks like the one next to it and the one next to it and the one next to it … and the song “It’s Hard to Be Cool in a Minivan” by the Oakridge Boys is playing in my head . NO!
The local florist takes flowers around in one, my house painters have one and even the guy that picks up my dry cleaning has one, am I missing something? Oh well it won’t be the first time- I mean parachute pants & grunge went right over my head too when everyone was into it and look where that got me!?
At least the old station wagon had the uber cool wood paneling sides, rear facing back seat (where the mom couldn’t see the kids laughing while she tried to parallel park a boat) and the distinct honor of being the largest safety hazard on 4 wheels*
*Golden Retriever not included
Until our champagne glasses and closets/garages meet again! Keep calm and carry a better handbag!
For more on cool cars that moms drive … and the death of the Volvo Station Wagon and other related articles take your pick from below:
- Volvo to end station wagon sales in U.S. (reviews.cnet.com)
- The death of the station wagon (money.cnn.com)
- Me & My Car (online.wsj.com)
- Top 10 Family Cars of 2011 (inautonews.com)
- Your Crossover is a Station Wagon. (ridelust.com)
Related Posts:
Filed Under: Featured • Look professional with Jackets and Jill
About the Author: Jill Mikols Etesse, happily married fashionista mother of 2 girls. Jill is co-founder and Creative Director SmartyShortz LLC , her fashion career has gone from buyer to designer to writer and touched every coast from NY to LA
Follow her on Twitter@fashionsmartyS
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Jill, jill, jill … I think you are great, but I love my minivan more than an expensive pair of shoes. Damnit, I didn’t mean to admit that … I have a Honda Odyssey. It is square, bulgy and carries a lot of kids, a sleeker version of how I looked 9 months pregnant with twins. It is a little time capsule of our lives … littered with ski tickets, valentine’s day hearts and other surprises. And I always wanted one of those American station wagons, what are they called?, with the brown panelling as part of my American experience.
julie
Ahhhhhhhhhhh the love I have for my minivan … you cannot comprehend that special bond until you experience it first hand. It is my little slice of heaven. It’s my Prozac. I love it! I really do … and I’m so not ashamed to proclaim that … love it, love it, love it. My minivan makes my life EASIER. And with three kids, easy simply beats out fashionable when it comes to cars … because a good portion of my day is spent in a car! I don’t run in heels and I don’t carry a sexy handbag. I drive a beat up dirty minivan that graciously accepts the abuse to which it’s constantly subjected. It gets scratched and dinged in parking lots, puked in, peed in, pooped in, it’s crumb-infested and smells of stale french fries … it is what it is and for that reason it causes me no stress. Besides who do I need to impress? Or better yet, who do I want to impress? Just my husband!! And he doesn’t care if he gets a hummer in a minivan or a Mercedes. And really … if you had a more economical minivan, then you’d have even more money to spend on fashion!
Always delighted to be the ying to your yang my dear friend!
Love, Love, Love … you AND my minivan
Hi Jill,
While I agree with your amusing article on the one hand, on the other hand it is very hard for me to think about ever giving up my living room on wheels. It is just so comfortable and perfectly made for moms and kids. While you may think my Prada bag looks out of place in the car, I truly enjoy the sliding doors and ability to fit my family, the grandparents and a babysitter at the same time. Not to mention I never have to rent a Uhaul to bring home furniture! Although I have to say we do not take the minivan out to dinner on Saturday nights. If we did, I really think I would avoid the valet:)
Randi
I hate to admit that years ago when my kids were toddlers that I broke down and drove a mini van. It was a top of the line model with all the bells and whistles. But honestly I felt like I was driving a “schoolbus” and that I was “losing” my identity by driving it. Within two years I was driving a Toyota Landcruiser and feeling like a cool mom when the kids were with me and when they were not I just enjoyed driving a “non Mom” car. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a mother, but do we always need to show that we are parents by driving the soccer parent van. Women remember there are other cars that work well for a family, besides mini vans and station wagons! But understandably we all can see the benefits of the sliding doors and captains chairs, especially with younger children.
Ladies Ladies a car is just another accessory but don’t make excuses about your life in a van because our SUV’s have our lives (and dirty sippy cups) in them as well
they just look better on the road, like a nice pair of shoes on the sidewalk….EASY is not always the answer, if that were the case we would all be walking the streets in slippers!
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