Mom and dad bloggers: Do you protect kids’ anonymity online?
julie | May 05, 2009 | Comments 11
What do other bloggers do to protect the anonymity of their children online? Do you use fake names or nicknames? Or do you use your children’s real names online?
It’s hard to blog about being a working mom, or about motherhood, without mentioning those whom we mother and love.
Please tell us how you handle this by taking the MomsToWork survey here (no names required ) and we’ll post the results online for everyone to see.
My friend and green mommy blogger extraordinaire, Lynn at OrganicMania chastised me for twittering the name of her youngest son online. Sorry Lynn. (It was an innocent tweet, your honor.) I asked Lynn if her son was better after falling down the steps, cracking his chin and getting five stitches. To protect her kids’ privacy, she uses the names Big Boy and Boo such as in this blog post on Hypermiling (Driving for efficiency).
Does using children’s real names threaten their safety?
Should Baby A and Baby B become Cuddlepot and Snugglepie?
The real issue, as Lynn pointed out, is the safety of our children. Are we endangering them by using their real names?
Should I revert to calling my twin boys, Baby A and Baby B? That’s what they were called in the hospital. And their father would be thrilled if they still wore the little hats from the hospital with the handwritten names, Baby A and Baby B. They looked just like the picture in the left of Snugglepot and Cuddlepie, an Australian children’s classic about two little gumnut babies. I could call Baby A Snugglepot and Baby B Cuddlepie but that would be way too cute, wouldn’t it?
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Filed Under: For New Moms • For Stay At Home Moms • Moms To Work • The People Who Love Us • Working Moms Resources
About the Author: Julie Power is a writer and editor with experience in both the United States and Australia where she was born and worked on newspapers for many years. She is currently the editor in chief of The Internet Marketing Report and the Internet Marketing Report blog at www.eIMR.blogspot.com. She lives with her husband and twin boys (8years old) in Bethesda, MD.
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I never use the kids names online, because I think they have a right to privacy. Even though they are just 7 and 10, they’re human beings with feelings just like me. The wrong words could result in years and years of expensive therapy! I call my kids Cricket and BumbleBee and my husband is The Nerd.
I use nicknames for my children, or say “my five-year-old”. I absolutely do not use their names — even in the names of photo files.
My first job is to protect my children, so if I’m going to blog about mothering them, I can’t let the blogging come before their safety.
I agree with Lynn, when writing my Mother Single blog I refer to my son as “Peanut”, the name I used when I was pregnant before I knew the gender. Too many crazies out there. I also use my nickname to protect us both. It’s important to put safety first on the net. Great post!
Julie, your post focused on safety, but I’d say it’s also for privacy reasons as these other commenters pointed out. Just because I choose to blog, doesn’t mean my children (or their friends or acquaintances) need to find a bunch of indexed google terms about their childhood foibles.
I see the point other blogging Moms are making about safety. As for privacy, my daughter is only a year old. While I’m sure she won’t want her gaffs on the web for her friends to see, I’m sure that I’ll do my part to embarass her eventually.
Thanks for advice and comments on privacy. I can see most of you use nicknames but that doesn’t sit well with me.
As a parent of twins, finding pseudonyms that one can keep straight is a challenge.
And we are not a family that uses endearments or nicknames readily. Names like the Nerd, which Christine uses her husband appeal … I am Australian, we love to abuse and swear! … but acronyms (DH, etc.) and nicknames like Snickety Poo make feel uncomfortable.
I may have to work on some others, like Bert and Ernie. But what would I call their dad? He’s too short to be Big Bird. And that’s probably trademarked anyway.
This is a great question! I have seen it all from DD,DS to nicknames. As for me, in my blog, I just refer to them as oldest and youngest sons. If I am going to a secure forum (like the one for my youngest son), I use his name. Likewise, if I have been on a soclal forum for more than a year and pretty much know the people I am talking with, then I will revert to their names.
“Oldest” and “youngest” gets a little tired, and I am not overly worried about security (both are online at this point using various usernames), but I still err on the side of caution.
Didn’t help not too long ago, when I used a picture of a birthday cake and you could clearly see the name of my youngest son! LOL!! Oh, well.
Personally, I think pictures are more dangerous. I have seen blogs with pictures of everywhere, everybody and everything; house, living room, yard, car, etc. If we are really worried about privacy, that is one area that would really be a security issue for me.
P.S. I will take the survey!
Julie…. Pseudonym ideas here…. Cain and Abel, Romulus and Remus, Thing 1 and Thing 2, and Mary Kate and Ashley! I’m taking Apollo and Artemis for my own children.
So, if I were to post this story using names, someone might get embarrassed when he or she gets older. This is true!
Apollo, Artemis, Bert and Ernie are all together on the playground. Apollo and Ernie are in the same class (hint, hint).
Apollo says to Artemis: I bet you don’t know anything about my friend Ernie.
Artemis: I know something about Ernie. He has legs
Ernie: I know something about Artemis. She has a vagina.
I started off using non-name nicknames: Princess and BamBam. After a while, it felt impersonal, so I changed over to Pseudonyms: Sarah and Max. Using names, they seem more like real people than just characters – yet still protects their identities.
My husband and I are expecting our first, so we’ve naturally had this conversation. Should we use the child’s first name? Middle name? Nickname? A pseudonym?
In the end, I’ll probably use their first name.
There were so many factors in the decision, but the overwhelming aspect of it came down to public records. Would I call my child by his/her name out loud in a public area where there are strangers? Yes. I wouldn’t think twice about it, even though their name would be out there in the open. The name is a public designation of identity and moreover, it is easily searchable by my name. Blogs can be hacked, identities can be revealed, and people can figure out where you live and what your kids’ names are anyway. So there is only limited privacy to begin with.
I think that if you take your children’s privacy and safety into consideration, you’ll be okay. Everybody has different standards for privacy and safety, and in our case it just doesn’t apply to the name of our child. If I want to protect his/her privacy, I’ll just be cautious about what I write.
Not only do I never use my son’s name (or my husband’s) I don’t use my own name. I have a very public job and I have learned that the internet is permanent. I prefer to keep my professional and personal life separate…I don’t need a colleague knowing intimate details about what I struggle with as a parent. Since the very first time I replied or posted a comment online I have always done it under a pseudonym.