First, I’m a Mom: Day 13 Since Layoff

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This is the fourth installment of “Diary of an Unemployed Finance Mom 2.0,” laid off late last week. This story is real, nothing is fabricated. For the sake of her privacy, and her hopes of landing a new job, she’s going under the pseudonym, job mom 2.0. Follow her trials and tribulations on Twitter @jobmom

I’ve always maintained that looking for a job is a full-time job. And that is still a truism for me. But having a toddler at home throws a wrench in things sometimes. Last week, it was the swine flu scare. Today, it was hysterics at nap time upon toddler’s return from pre-school when he saw me working in the office. When hubby has days off (he’s freelance, so that happens every now and then), our nanny gives him a heads up so he can hide so our toddler doesn’t see him. That way, toddler can make a bee-line to the crib, with baba and “b” (blankie) in hand, and go down for a nice, long (sometimes three-hour!) snooze. But I just can’t do that. When I hear his little voice, I melt – I need to see that cute little face and hug him and smell him and try my best not to take a bite! He’s just so awesome these days. And then there’s that fantastic severance I got.

See, I was laid off once before. That’s right, I’m twice a victim of this nasty credit crisis and ensuing recession. Last time, though, things were very different. Toddler was a baby of seven months old. And perhaps more importantly, my severance sucked (to put it mildly). I only got eight weeks, and was completely freaking out about money and needing to get a job ASAP. Not the “right” job, any job: we had a mortgage to pay and were maintaining a very expensive lifestyle (hubby traveling back and forth to where he was working, a 1.5 hour plane ride – not cheap!). And I admit, I wasn’t exactly a great “baby” person. He was very cute, but I have a lot more fun interacting with him now that we can (sort of) have a conversation.

And so last time, I worked – I mean, really worked. From 7 a.m until 7 p.m. (minimum), I was at the computer and on the phone. All day, every day. I woke up at 6 a.m to work out and shower before starting my marathon job search day. And I loved it. Or at least I thought I did.

It was a strange time for me. Friends and family would ask, “So are you enjoying your time off? Spending lots of time with baby?” I’d just smile and say yes, for fear of having my head bitten off by the judgmental folk with whom I surround myself. I suppose I was so afraid of being caught without a job when that severance ran out that I didn’t stop (not even for one moment) to breathe and take stock of things and actually enjoy some time off including some very important bonding time with my baby, as non-verbal he was back then.

This time is different. Maybe it’s because of the severance. Maybe it’s because I’ve been through this before and know how to tap all my resources. Maybe it’s because we had already scaled back significantly before I was laid-off, prompted by the general downturn in the economy and cemented by my horrifically horrible bonus. Maybe it’s because with unemployment at 8.6%, many of those basis points in finance, I know I’m not finding a job in my first two weeks among the ranks of the unemployed. And maybe it’s because I really want to be happy – which now includes spending time with my son – both during this time and after I’ve figured it out (well – figured it out at least for now).

Job seeker first, mom second no longer

Blinded by fear, last time I was a job seeker first and a mom second (a far second at that).

Now, with eyes open, I am beginning to see more clearly what really matters to me. Money is very important. I can’t lie. We are a two-income family (with a fledgling small business on the side), and we truly need both incomes. Toddler’s college fund must be funded, his nanny must be compensated, his pre-school tuition bill must be paid. And we love things like great clothes, fabulous shoes and vacation.

But finding the right job with the right people, or the right “track two” opportunity, which gives me time to spend with my son (even if only the time with him afforded me by my last job, which was about an hour in the early morning, a few hours at night, and all weekend) is now paramount.

Perhaps it will involve a little creative negotiating when a real opportunity presents itself – in time we shall see. But I’m committed to making it happen.

I hear toddler. He just woke up from his nap. I’m going to pluck him out of his crib and give him lots of snuggles. And that will make my day.

Filed Under: Diary of an Unemployed Finance Mom 2.0 • Managing Your Career • The People Who Love Us • Working Moms Resources