While the majority of women today enter the workforce at some point in their lives, the birth of a child often causes a woman to rethink her career, at least on a temporary basis. Among other concerns, a new mother often must weigh relevant financial concerns, including not only overall household income, but also the costs of daycare, taxes, and other job-related expenses. In some cases, a family may determine that it is simply not cost-effective for a new mother to return to work, when comparing the costs of the mother working vs. the financial impact to the household income of the mother staying at home with the new child.

The first step toward evaluating whether one parent should forego work and remain at home for childcare purposes involves drafting a household budget for both of your potential situations, including one with both parents working and producing income, and one with only one parent working and contributing to the family income. The budget process will help clarify your financial situation. One thing that you may discover is that returning to work may not do much to increase your household income, especially after paying for costs such as childcare, transportation and taxes.

The Marriage Tax Penalty

Our national income tax system places a penalty on married couples with two significant incomes. The combined income of the couple will inevitably push the couple into a higher tax bracket, which causes the couple to owe more in income taxes. This so-called “marriage penalty” actually works as a disincentive for both spouses to work. In some cases, the tax savings may be substantial if one spouse stays home and provides child care, as the family may fall within a much lower tax bracket, thus causing the family to owe less in income taxes.

The Child Tax Credit

Furthermore, by having only one spouse work, your lower tax bracket may entitle you to claim the child tax credit, and even the additional child tax credit in some circumstances. If you are eligible for the child tax credit, you may be able to reduce your income taxes by as much as $1,000 for each qualified minor child. Your child qualifies for the child tax credit if he or she meets the following criteria:

• The child was age 16 or younger at the end of the tax year.
• The child was your biological child, stepchild, foster child, adopted child, sibling, stepsibling, or any of their offspring including your grandchild, niece or nephew.
• The child cannot have provided more than half of his or her own financial support.
• You have claimed the child as your dependent on your federal tax return.
• The child is a citizen, national, or resident alien of the U.S.
• The child has lived with you for more than half of the calendar year for which you must pay taxes.

Your ability to claim the full child tax credit is directly tied to your household’s adjusted gross income, your filing status, and the amount that you owe in income taxes or any alternative minimum tax. As your adjusted gross income rises, the child tax credit phases out.

Moreover, you may be able to claim an additional child tax credit in some circumstances, such as where the income taxes that you owe are too low for you to claim the entire amount of the child tax credit. Therefore, substantially lowering your family’s adjusted gross income by having only one spouse work can entitle you to tax credits that otherwise would be unavailable to you due to your income.

Dependent and Child Care Tax Credit

If both you and your spouse work, and you must pay a qualified caregiver or daycare facility in order for you both to work, then you should be able to claim the dependent and child care tax credit. Based on your income, you are entitled to a tax credit for a certain percentage of the eligible child care expenses that you paid. This percentage ranges from 20% of the expenses that you paid to 35% of the expenses. In any case, this tax credit is capped at $3,000 for one eligible child and $6,000 for two eligible children.

If you wish to claim the dependent and child care tax credit, you must meet the following conditions:

• The expenses were for the care of a child under the age of 13 or a spouse or dependent who was unable to care for himself or herself due to a mental or physical condition.
• You and your spouse had earned income for the tax year.
• The child care provider that you paid for your child’s care is not one of your dependents.
• You paid for child care so that you and/or your spouse could work or look for work.

Assuming that you meet all of the above requirements, you can claim a tax credit for a certain percentage of the child care expenses that you paid. If, however, your employer deducted amounts from your wages pre-tax for the purposes of qualified child care expenses, those amounts reduce the amount of the child care tax credit that you can claim.

There are a variety of factors to consider when deciding to go back to work after the birth of a child. Tax issues – such as the marriage tax penalty, the child tax credit, and the dependent and child care tax credit – should all factor into the decision-making process. Whatever your situation may be, carefully considering these issues is essential to making the right decision for your family.

Linda Lawrence is a writer for BackTaxesHelp.com, a site that provides easy-to-understand guides on resolving tax problems, such as how to remove a bank account levy and how to set up IRS installment plans. Additionally, the BackTaxesHelp Tax Blog offers news and advice on a variety of tax-related topics.

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photo credit: Chris R McFarland

It’s that time of year again … Christmas is just days away and we’ve got some excited kids to keep occupied. Here’s a list of some cute online holiday activities to fill the days.

- A personalized Santa video directly from the North Pole. A company in Canada has created a wonderful Santa video. Parents, you do need to personalize the video, but for the 4-8 year old set, the resulting video is perfect. And for older kids, the laugh is worth it.

- Leave a message for Santa. If your children really, really need to tell Santa just one more thing, this is the place to start. You can call this free 24/7 Santa Hotline and leave a message with one of his live elves.

- Christmas coloring pages. We liked these sets and these.

- Google has some cute tricks up its sleeve this year: in the Google search bar, type in “Hannukah” (no quotes) or “let it snow” (no quotes) and watch the magic.

- As always, your kids can track Santa around the world with NORAD. Tracking begins on Christmas Eve.

Have any other great Holiday activities, let us know in the comments!

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photo credit: Gilles San Martin

A few years ago, when my daughter was in elementary school and came home one day with a note from the school nurse, declaring a lice outbreak. No sharing of hairbrushes or of hats, all bookbags and coats needed to be stored in plastic bags at school. Not long after that note, I get a call from the nurse, my daughter had lice and she couldn’t come back to school until the lice and nits were removed.

I was horrified. Lice?!? Isn’t that a problem for other people? To other families whose kids don’t wash their hair? Or a dirty household? What does this say about me as a mom? As a kid growing up in suburbia in the 80s, my classmates and I got the cursory lice check but we never had an outbreak.

In fact, until my daughter had lice, I never even knew what a louse or a nit (louse eggs) even looked like, nevermind try to stop an infestation.

Since the school district had a no-nit policy, I ended up taking a few days off of work, but thankfully my then boss who had no kids was understanding. Let’s just say that my initial attempts to rid the lice were unsuccessful and I failed the no-nit check by the school nurse the first time I tried bringing my daughter back to school. I should also note that my daughter – at the time – had long hair and hated getting her hair combed. Trust me, I had more than a few fantasies of cutting her hair short.

The first lesson I learned about removing lice and nits and this, while there are all sorts of lice removal preparations on the market, the only way to remove an infestation is to soak the hair in olive oil or mayo (as the pediatrician’s office recommended) and comb the hair thoroughly. Soaking the hair overwhelms the lice and combing removes the attached nits. Comb comb comb. And comb some more. Procure a shower cap if you don’t have one already handy and let your child’s hair soak for an hour or so.

The other unsaid, but very very useful tip is to trash the commercial nitcombs that and go for dog flea comb. You’ll get over the ick factor quickly after you realize that these combs are not only sturdier, but they are easier to use.

I can’t say enough about Tea Tree Oil shampoo, which is a natural lice repellent. Once I heard about it’s use, I went straight to the natural foods store in town and got the biggest bottle and used it until it was gone. We didn’t have an re-infestation.

Also while vacuuming the house entirely 3 or 4 times may make you feel better, lice are unable to jump. You should wash in hot water any clothing, hats or linens that your child comes in contact with. It’s recommended that you purchase new hairbrushes and combs to stop a re-infestation.

And what reminded me of that now long ago lice outbreak? I just heard that my former boss, who was understanding (ok, a few nitpicking jokes) during those stressful few days, is now dealing with a lice outbreak at his child’s school.

Update 1: After we published our story, a representative from Lice Treatment Center LLC a company which provides in home and organizational lice removal services reached out to us via Twitter letting us know that they are here to help and are available nationwide in the US.

Update 2: Cozy Friedman CEO of Cozy’s Cuts For Kids reached out to via Twitter to let us know that Tea tree oil shampoo is available outside health food stores now. Brands like Boo! are in salons & drug stores.

Update 3: Wouldn’t you know it? A few months after writing this post, my daughter got lice again…this time from her summer sleepaway camp. Here we go again.

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Twitter helps you find deals and coupons

With inflation, uncertain gas prices and just about the cost of everything rising fast and furiously, it seems that moms like us are in need of a good deal or two. Couponing isn’t just something our mothers did. In fact, one of the most popular shows on TV right now is about the practice of Extreme Couponing.

In light of this, we’ve pulled together a list of some of the most prolific couponers on Twitter. So, take a few minutes and start finding those deals!

Coupon and Deal Finding Twitter Accounts
@mamacheaps
@frugalicioushow
@housewifehacks
@ILoveFreeThings
@frugalgirls
@retailmenot
@coupons
@dealsplus
@shopaneer
@savings
@tjoos
@momswhosave
@extremecoupon
@savethecoupon
@consumerqueen

Social shopping network for deals @getcheep
Twitter deal/coupon aggregator @cheaptweet

Do you know of any other couponing Twitter users? Let us know in the comments!

Using Twitter to find the best grocery coupons and deals

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Last month I was lucky enough to sit down with my son’s NICU Doctor, Mark Polak, MD, Chief of Neonatology at West Virginia Children’s Hospital in Morgantown, WV.  Since having a baby in the NICU, be it three or 30 days and beyond, can stressful, I wanted to ask him who parents will meet, what they can expect, and what as a NICU physician, he wishes parents knew.  Here is what he had to say.

1- Aside from NICU Doctors, who else can parents expect to meet during their child’s stay?

In the NICU there are NeoNatologists, and Fellows, these are doctors who have completed a residency in Pediatrics plus an extra three years in this specialty.  There are Pediatric Residents who are going through training, medicine residents, consulting services like neurology, ophthalmology, ENTs, Pulmonologists, Cardiologists, nephrology, GI, orthopedists, infectious diseases, endocrinology, radiology, Physical Therapists (they are not as common in our hospital), Occupational Therapists, Child Life Services, Counselors, Neonatal Nurse Practitioners, who are Masters Level trained Nurses, staff nurses who have additional training for NICU, respiratory therapists, dietitians who work on growth and weight gain, Pharmacists and Pharm D’s.  The Pharmacists and PharmD‘s are really important to us because were talking about babies weighing sometimes under 1000 grams and we need their skill when it comes to mixing medications, and IVs.   Here we also use counselors, for parents and families, and we have a parent support group.

2- As a NICU Doctor, what is it you wish parents knew?

I wish they knew the investment they need to make when their child enters the NICU.  In our view, the parents are patients too.  This is one thing we need to remember.  The one thing I think is essential is that we need to develop communication early on.  One thing we are now doing here is group based treatment where we as a team of physicians map out our plan of action based on the individual child’s needs and share that with the parents from beginning as best we can as we see issues that need or may need addressed.  This is currently being done at Children’s in Columbus, OH and this type of group based treatment has cut down some long-term stays for patients with BDP, a type of Chronic Lung Disease, from 300 to 200 days.  Here, we’re really beginning to focus more on micro preemies, (those babies born under 1000 grams) and their parents because their stays are usually longer, the babies are on the ventilators longer due to immature lungs.   One of the things Childrens in Ohio, is doing is working to help reduce noise, using a form of a stoplight to let parents and visitors know when noise needs to be cut down as these types of things can agitate the babies and its proving to be useful.

Another area where communication is important is our terminology.  In the case of Chronic Lung Disease, people hear chronic and think that its something that will go on forever as it is with adults.  Babies will eventually outgrow chronic lung, but its getting over that communication gap and keeping everyone on the same page thats important.

3- What can parents expect in the first few days in the NICU?

The first few days are not mapped out.  No matter whats going on, or how tough or how good, things can change.  Caution will never leave when your in the NICU.  Everything is uncertain.  When an adult goes into the ER, we can say, they’ve had a heart attack, here is what we need to do and we know thier medical history so we know what to look for.  When babies come to us, we don’t know what heath issues they face or what can arise.  I’m currently participating in a a Monoclomal Antibodies trial with our micropreemies, but they have to fall under a certain weight.

4- Is there anything you think parents should know about brining their child home from NICU?

Discharge needs to be reality based.  Is the baby ready for discharge?  Is it taking enough breastmilk or formula to continue to grow?  Are the parents comfortable with the medications thier baby might need, if they have an oxygen monitor and most importantly, without our staff?  Alot of parents get used to having us around when alarms go off and to give medications.  At home they need to address this.  Do other caregivers know what going on and what’s needed?  Parents need to remind themselves that the baby is in charge.  Our goal is ensure the baby will survive and be healthy and not just live.

5- What can women do to help prevent pre-term birth?

Do what your doctor says when pregnant.  Every day you stay pregnant or in the hospital as was your case, is three to four days less in the NICU for the baby.  Compliancy with your doctors orders is so important.

6- Why do you think pre-term birth is on the rise?

We see a lot of late pre-term births due to planned deliveries.  The economy is another big factor.  Lack of prenatal care and other public health issues.  Here in West Virginia, over 25% of women who are child-bearing age smoke.  Obesity, diabetes, and other health problems can also play a role.

For more information about West Virgina Children’s Hopsital and Dr. Mark Polak please visit: http://www.wvukids.com/healthcare-services/pediatric-neonatology.aspx

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The latest game among my group of friends?

Rating each other on a scale of zero, a pushover, to Tiger Mom, a fierce mom like Amy Chua, who sprung to fame via The Wall Street Journal about her new book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.

“Oh yeah, she’s tough. She’s a tiger mom, we whisper.”

One friend was relieved to find another mother who she knew was tougher than her.

How do you rate your parenting style? Take the survey at SkinnyScoop.

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Thanks to our virtual friends …

What do you do when you and your kids go off the rails?

It happens to me as regularly as the trains that run on those cliched rails, but I never seem to get the schedule ahead of time. Usually about every six months something goes badly wrong and a happy  family becomes, for a week or so, a horror show.

Angels by day, devils by night

I am steaming through life, and BAM!, it starts.  Like a month or so ago when my kids wouldn’t shut up or go to sleep or listen or go into time out, or do anything because I am apparently a stupid mother!

“We hate you, mom! You are so MEAN!!!! And by the way, you are just a weird Australian who doesn’t get us Americans and you talk funny. Really funny. MOM!”

To start the week, we had one of those nightmare bedtimes that were inches away from a weirdly enough headline like, “Fan chops boys hand off” or “Mom swats boy’s shoulder in half with amazing karate chop.”

I heard a whirring noise from their bedroom, only to discover one of my twin boys trying to stop the fan on the ceiling with his hand.  He said he was trying to reach for the cord. I swatted his hand away from imminent amputation, and got his shoulder instead.

He started crying, accusing me of hitting him, yelling how much he hated me.  With his twin egging him on, he cried and laughed, mocking me for everything I said and did.

It was a swat rather than a karate chop.

For the three hours, or so it felt, both of my twins ranted and raved, jumped up and down, asked for water, milk, gin and tonics (joking … that was me) and screamed and acted nothing like the sweet little boys who had come from school that day. They wanted snacks, they were hungry, they needed to go to the bathroom AGAIN, they hated me, they loved me, they were too hot, too cold, they were scared, he hit me, get him out of my bed and did I mention they were hungry and needed food, milk, water and snacks and more food?

Their poor behavior and mine … I yelled plenty and threatened loss of privileges for a lifetime … shamed me. Made me feel like the worst failure of a parent in the world.

So I sought help from MomstoWork’s growing pearl of a community on Facebook.

I was amazed by how generous people were with their time. One discussed my children’s behavior over lunch with a pediatrician friend, and reported back with tips. Another mom with two kids checked in a few times on the Facebook discussion to see whether things had improved.

Valerie’s pediatrician friend advised:

“Absolutely no snacks after bedtime. It stimulates kids, encourages them to stay awake and is disruptive to sleep. To quote her: “If somebody brought you a snack in bed, wouldn’t that encourage you to stay awake and alert?”"

The kitchen is closed! Really

Kerry told me to be firm, not give in and close the kitchen.

The poor behavior continued that week.

Everyone checked back in. Others encouraged me to urge their dad to stick to the same lines. (Our ongoing argument is over his bedtime technique of rewarding the kids for being still and quiet in bed by saying, “You can have a glass of milk if you are still and quiet for 30 minutes.” I feel that’s encouraging them to stay awake.)

It did improve. And I felt better. And it reminded me that these periodical patches of poor parenting and crazy kids are often a great way to step back and reflect on what’s changed.

In my case, I hadn’t given full credit to the fact that it was Week Four of the new school year. Everyone was tired after getting up earlier for several weeks and the excitement of the new school year had dissipated. And I don’t know about you, but there are days when getting the kids into bed by 8 p.m. is unrealistic.

I pick them up at 6 p.m. from childcare two days a week, often discover the homework not done, despite promises to the contrary, then it is home to cook dinner, eat, finish homework, discuss the day’s news … Some nights it is closer to 9 p.m by the time the teeth, story and bed show gets under way.

I figure it is like this for many working families at the end of the day. Sometimes we all get too tired, give in to inconsistent behavior and we all go to bed way too late.

The following weeks have been much better.

But it made me feel very grateful to my circle of virtual friends and the many friends who email and call to catch up, give support, and just gossip, when there’s  no time to see each other.

I think that’s something us moms do well.

My question: What do you do when you have a bad parenting moment?

I promise if you want to ask a question on our Facebook page, we’ll cheer you on and come to your virtual rescue.

In the meantime, for all the criticism of the time we spend online, it is also worth remembering the upside … the virtual friends who spare a moment to send a supportive tweet although they may be living in a different time zone. The women and men who share a joke on Facebook that makes you smile after a crap day at work. The people on sites like TheSkinnyScoop who make you realize you are not as crazy as you may have thought.

So dear readers, please accept my thanks for being so nice to us at MomstoWork.

Come back again, and hey, remember, we love your guest posts!!!

MomstoWork cofounder,

Julie Power

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Because all mothers work!

Thanks for visiting MomstoWork. Our tagline is Because all mothers work! We want to make your work more enjoyable, easier and more rewarding. What can you find on our site?

• Tips on crafting a resume or a cover letter to help you find a new job or return to work after a gap.
• News and updates on issues affecting working moms
• Working mom stories, including those about nursing at work.
• Advice on what to feed your kid, the very popular toddler food pyramid and a few recipes, and
• Professional advice ranging from e-mail to what to wear with our fashion expert, Jackets to Jill.

Hey! What would you like us to write about? Would you like to write something for us? Drop us a line in the comments below.

Who are we? MomstoWork is three working moms, Joy Larkin, Julie Power and Renee Yarborough, who live and work in Philadelphia, Virginia and Maryland, and our great guest fashion blogger is Jill Mikols Etesse. She lives in the world of fashion.

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Moms to Work but education first

Send a special mom back to school.   And please tweet or publicize this to your Facebook friends for a good cause.

eLearners.com is offering moms and dads full-tuition scholarships at ProjectWorkingmom.com.

About 100 scholarships are still available. In total, Project Working Mom 2010 will award up to 285 full-tuition scholarships, valued at nearly $5 million.

The Project Working Mom scholarships are for online programs from the certificate to Ph.D. level.

You can encourage a deserving woman to apply for a Project Working Mom scholarship through the eLearners.com, “Nominate a Mom,” application on Facebook. This program allows people to nominate a special woman in their life (mom, wife, sister, friend, etc.) who they think deserves the Project Working Mom scholarship.

Nominations on Facebook at  or the “Nominate a Mom” tab on the Project Working Mom Facebook page.

The accredited online institutions providing the scholarships are: Ashford University, Everest University, Virginia College, Walden University, Capella University, Saint Leo University, Allied Schools and Ashworth College.

Project Working Mom 2010 is the fourth in a series of Project Working Mom scholarship programs designed to break the cycle of under-education and under-employment. In total, the Project Working Mom programs have generated more than 600,000 applications for full-tuition scholarships from moms and dads who want to return to school. To date, more than 245 full-tuition scholarships have been awarded, totaling about $9 million.

A new study by College Board found:

• 2008 college graduates with four-year degrees earned almost $22,000 more annually, on average, than those with high school diplomas
• unemployment rate for college graduates was 5.1 percent lower, when compared to those who only had a high school diploma.

Deadline: Applications must be submitted by Thursday, September 30 at 5pm EDT.

BTW, don’t forget to visit MomstoWork on Facebook, too, and add us to your list of really favorite sweet and useful sites for moms who work … very very hard.

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